You knock one down....

I had my first exam yesterday, it was...interesting. I say interesting, what i really mean is that it was a disaster. I didn't finish either of the questions, and i was actually struck by writers block half way through the second one - basically a case of "Oh fuck, i have no idea where I'm going with this". Oh well, re-sits in August.

Very brief update today, as writers block has once again struck me. And I'm slightly drunk. And its 2:14 in the morning. I'm sure you'll live.

Ciao.

Nemesis

Do you know what i hate? The Wind. Do you know why? Because it's pushy, it's bossy, it acts like it owns the place, no matter what kind of day it is. Say it's pissing down with rain, your huddled up in your coat, head down, just trying to get to where you want to go without taking the Nile with you, and all of a sudden, here comes the wind saying "Where do you think your going? I think you should go this way instead." Although, since he is speaking in his native tongue, what you actually hear is a great howl, and suddenly you find yourself staggering backwards, or sideways.

Same again on a sunny day, your strolling along, minding your own business, catching some rays, all of sudden, along comes the wind, "Hey Fucker, walk faster!" and suddenly your being propelled forward. Again, to the sound of a great howl. (It's not a very imaginative language, the wind. Beats German or French though.) Whenever instances like these happen to me, you'll often hear my brain shouting "Fuck off!" to the heavens, and of course the heaven's reply "Fuck you!", which sounds oddly like more wind.

I was looking outside today, and it was a perfectly sunny day, but there was wind howling away. I thought "Bastard!", and then along came the cloud, which got rid of the sun, to which i thought, "Fucker!". Then i went to the cinema and saw Magicians and forgot all about it. That film is mental, utterly mental. Funny, don't get me wrong, but completely whack.

Morning Glory

Lets face it, nobody likes mornings, or to be specific, waking up. Waking up is like eating the last morsels of your favorite meal: It's so good you want it to last longer, you'd rather it wasn't the last morsels, and you sure as hell wish that the drop-dead gorgeous women you were staring at a few minutes ago was real.

Me, i personally hate getting up. My first train of though every morning is "five more minutes"...and then its about 20 minutes later and I'm running late. Fab. Once I'm up, its all well and good, but it's just so damn hard. Think of Sleep like Venom, off Spiderman 3, it clings to you, it doesn't want to let you go, and it makes you act like an emo asshole.

Yeah, Spiderman 3 was ok, bit cheesy in places, possibly too many bad guys, as the reviews say, but I'm not too sure. There was something off about that film that i just couldn't quite put my finger on.

Can't wait for Transformers, it's going to kick ass, then nuke that ass with a 50 megaton missile.

I know, today's update is a bit random, but what can ya do? Peace out.

Good Evening Europe

That's right folks, it was that time again. Europe's greatest national event, it's finest cultural achievement, and proof that you really can't destroy the Soviet Union: The Eurovision Song Contest.

First inaugurated in Switzerland back in1956, the Eurovision contest was mainly an attempt to test 'Live TV' broadcast technology, as opposed to actually doing something useful, like help unify a post-war Europe. "Never mind that our economy is shot to hell and the Russians are moving in, lets experiment with Television!". To be fair, it is a great show though.

Whilst the format, rules etc... of the show have slowly changed and developed over the years, the basics have always remained the same: A participating country submits a performance with a song. That song is sung live in the Host country, and broadcasted all across Europe, and even the rest of the world, via Live Television. Once all the songs have been sung, the voting begins. And that's where things start going slightly pear shaped.

The problem is, even for something as care-free, cheesy, and just plain naff as Eurovision, politics still manages gets its greasy, back-stabbed hands all over it. This usually rears its ugly head in the form of regional voting blocks, for example: All the former USSR countries, vote for each other - proof that the Soviet Union still lives on. The Balkan chaps also vote for each other, as do the European block. Typically, no-one votes for the UK much these days, because everyone hates us. Except Malta. You should of seen it in 2003/2004 just after we invaded Iraq - nul pwa (0 pints). The song wasn't that bad.

Serbia won it this year, which was gay. The song was crap, and most of us had trouble working out whether the singer was a guy or a lesbian. At least with Ukraine's drag act you knew where you stood, and the song was hilarious. I have theorised that it was only because this is Serbia's first year as an independent state, having just separated from Montenegro. Everyone decided to be nice to it.

At the end of the day though, hats off to another cheese-filled, politically correct year, and to Terry Wogan and his legendary commentating skills. Good night Europe, until next time.

Dance, Dance

Today, I'm going to talk about a dance, but not just any dance...the dance. The dance that preoccupies most single men and women whenever they come into contact with each other. Yes my friends, that dance: Le Tango de flirting/getting a date.

I've been trying to avoid it recently because, quite frankly I'm no good at it. What little relationships I've had have usually been spontaneous, random, or a disaster. Either way, they never lasted that long and involved little work from either party. A prolonged campaign has never worked. But just recently, i decided to give it another try, for reasons that I'm sure you can guess. She's a very nice girl btw. I won't go into details because, people i actually see on a day-to-day basis may read this....and that's bad. (Which reminds me: must delete this from my Facebook feed as soon as it pops up)

Anyway, I'm not even a few days into the dance (At the moment, its a one man show as far as i can tell) and I'm already despairing. Reason: other people. They complicate things. Especially when packing an ego. I just can't compete, I won't compete, out of general principle...unfortunately, the afore mentioned ego must be surpassed before i can get anywhere...

I guess I'm just working myself up over nothing...i promised myself i was just seeing where this can go...no need to get me knickers in a twist. I promise a more upbeat update next time. Just wanted to get this off my chest. Ciao.

Poker Face

The amount of poker I've played recently is rather disturbing. The amount of money I have potentially lost had those chips been worth real money is even more so. But it is such a fun game.

I first got taught how to play it properly a couple of weeks ago, by a good American friend of mine. Yes i know, it's hard to believe, but contrary to popular belief, some Americans are decent, and she is one of them. I so kicked her ass.

Then came this Thursday just gone. I went to a little get together with some friends down the road - mini-house party style. There was alcohol, there was truth or dare games (which generally ended in all of us Irish Jigging in the street), and then there was Poker! My American friend put my kicking her ass down to beginners luck, so this was the ultimate rematch of sorts. She wiped the floor with me. Although, to be fair, there was like 6 other people i had to keep and eye on as well, but she was wiping the floor with all of them. I went bust 3 times, and each time, i asked her, "Feeling Generous Whitney?". Which of course, she was, bless her.

After i busted for the 4th, and final time, it was a bout 1:30 AM, there were only a few of us left, and i had an exam that day. So i said my goodbyes, went up the road back to my own house, with the firm and square intention of getting into bed, and going to sleep. Then i realised my house mates were also playing poker, so i decided to muck in with them. Oh dear. It was about several hands, no busts and a few pints of water later, that i realised it was 5AM, that i still had an exam that day (along with a 9AM lecture), and that it was unlikely i was going to get any sleep. So i started giggling.

Finally finished at about 6:30, went to sleep and missed my 9AM lecture, went and did my exam (Fail) and went to another house party that night. Which also involved Poker. I know what your thinking, and yes, i do want my own poker set. I'm not an addict though.

P.s. The picture - I am aware it is from the wrong game. Allow it. Also, I'll see if i can make the updates slightly more regular. Sorry.